


Ash Wings

by brooklyn1967



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Death, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Established Relationship, I dont know what to tag, M/M, Sad, Sadness, angel!cas - Freeform, hunter!dean, im kinda new at this, sad!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-28
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-03-04 00:18:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2901650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brooklyn1967/pseuds/brooklyn1967
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based on this post: https://weheartit.com/entry/152484343 which says:</p><p>What if Cas died in Dean's arms and he had scorched wing marks on his skin for the rest of his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ash Wings

**Author's Note:**

> This is a one-shot that I hope you all enjoy. I'm kinda new to all this so it would be great if you commented what you liked and maybe some improvements. If you do like it you could also leave kudos *wink**wink* :)
> 
> I'm also looking for a beta reader for my one-shots and my main, longer fanfic so you can message me on my tumblr for that. :) 
> 
> Tumblr: http://team-freepoop.tumblr.com/

At first Dean’s mind went blank. He couldn’t think straight and all he could hear was a buzzing in his ear. He thought it was a dream, just a nightmare. He would wake up from this and everything would be alright. Cas would be the natural dorking person he is, talking about bees and asking Dean to explain every godforsaken reference. Sammy would laugh at Dean’s frustrated sighs, his eyes peering over his laptop screen. Everything would be okay. 

Then Dean closed his eyes, he couldn’t bare the sight of what was in front of him. He closed them as tight as he could and after he counted to ten under his breath he opened them trying to wake himself up. The problem was, he wasn’t sleeping so he wasn’t able to wake up. He was already awake. 

He was awake yet what laid in front of him was the works of a nightmare. 

After realising that this was happening - that this was real - Dean came half to his senses and he quickly analysed what was happening while running up to the body. They were in an old warehouse and the only light source was the windows. In front of Dean was blood. An angels blood. It splattered the tan trench coat. It stuck to the raven hair. It was flowing from the stomach, which was covered with a hand, and was making a puddle on the floor. The body - Castiel’s body - was lying on the floor, his chest rising with his staggered breaths. 

“Cas buddy, can you hear me?” Dean asked kneeling next to Castiel. Cas’ eyes were closed, lips dry but Dean knew he was alive. He had to be alive. There was a grunt. Then his eyes flew open. It took a few seconds of Cas blinking before he said anything.

“D-Dean?” He stuttered, his voice hoarse. Not the beautiful voice that was a mixture of sex and early mornings. No, it was a voice mixed with death, vomit and drowning. 

“Yeah everything’s gonna be alright buddy.” Dean gave him empty promises. “I’m just gonna lift you up now okay?” He started putting his right up under Cas and his left over him to haul Cas up onto his lap. 

“No Dean. Don’t.” Castiel grunted trying to move out of Deans grip and just simply hold his hand.

“Cas baby, you don’t know what you’re saying. I’m just gonna hold ya while we wait for Sammy to help me haul you to the hospital okay. Everythings gonna be okay.” Dean told him quietly and as Dean repeated the words ‘everythings gonna be okay’ he blinked away tears and knew he was trying to comfort himself more than anything else.

After Dean trying to hold Cas, because the only thing Dean could think about was that he had to hold his angel, and Cas trying to stay on the floor, Dean managed to get him into his arms. Cas was growing weak and didn’t have the energy to move away from Dean. Castiel’s head rested on Dean’s right shoulder and Dean’s hands covered Cas’ which were trying to stop the bleeding. Dean also kept kissing Cas’ hair - tasting mild copper as he did so - and peppered kisses all over Cas’ face, ears and neck. There was a slight smile on Castiel’s face as Dean kept repeating that everything was gonna be okay between kisses and although Dean knew it was a sad smile, it was still beautiful. 

After a little while, Cas’ croaky voice spoke up. “Dean?”

“Hm, buddy?” Dean mumbled into Cas’ hair.

“I love you.” He whispered. 

“I love you too baby but don’t be saying your goodbyes. Everythings gonna be alright.” 

“No Dean listen to me.” The words were choked and Dean couldn’t bear to hear this broken voice come from the man he loved. “I’m gonna die soon, but we will see eachother again but for your own sake please close your eyes, lay me on the ground and stand as far away from me as you can.” 

“No baby, I’m gonna stay right here where I can see your gorgeous face.” Dean told him. 

“Dean-” Cas started but couldn’t seem to finish.

“Cas buddy. Baby please don’t leave me. I love you so so much. Please don’t leave me. You are half of the only family I have. Please stay. I need you.” Tears were falling down Dean’s cheeks as he begged for something he knew wasn’t going to happen. Cas’ eyes were now closed and Dean noticed a small white glow coming from the middle of his chest that was slowly growing. It was so bright and before it could blind him, Dean closed his eyes and buried his face into Cas’ shoulder. 

Eventually Dean looked up and opened his eyes and the glow was gone but with it, so had Cas’ life. Dean didn’t know what to do so he just sat there crying and whispering nothing but everything to Castiel’s body. He barely noticed the black, ash-like marks on either side of them.

After what felt like ages of Dean gripping onto Cas’ body, Sam ended up finding Dean. He helped his brother with Cas’ body and that night they gave him a proper hunter’s funeral, burning everything except that stupid trench coat which Dean had to keep. He had to.

It was then the next morning when Dean was getting ready for a shower did he see the marks Cas’ death had left on him. On his left side was part of a wing that went from his chest, up above Castiel’s handprint that had been left on Dean’s shoulder and curved just behind Dean’s left ear. On his right side another part of the other wing went from the center of Dean’s chest to just below his elbow. He knew what they were straight away. He had only seen Cas’ wings once but that image had stayed with him forever and now he had them scarred onto his body in a shade of ash. Like a stupid handprint wasn’t enough, he now had wings to remind him of what he had lost. His precious, beautiful, dorky angel. 

A week later the wings were still there.

A month later the wings were still there.

A year later the wings were still there.

Five years.

Ten and sometimes he didn’t know if they were making him feel full or incredibly empty.

At moments Dean would want to hide the marks as much as possible, to protect Cas in a way. The world had killed him so it was no longer able to see his beauty. At other moments he would wear a short sleeved top just so that everyone could see that Dean had Cas to the very end and that Cas had always been his. 

Dean was the same with the trenchcoat. Sometimes he would chuck it into the back of his wardrobe in the bunker swearing that he would never want to see the damn thing again but then at other times all Dean could do was grab onto it as much as possible and fall asleep with it it in his grip. 

After Castiel’s death Dean had extreme mood swings, Sammy thought he was bipolar but Dean refused to go to a doctor. Anyway, Sam dealt with them fairly well, as tiring as it was, and eventually they got further apart from each other. Dean never found someone like Cas again and held onto the words that they were gonna see each other again at some point and Dean got on with his life, hunting monsters because that was what he did. Always had done. 

And whatever mood Dean was in he had those ash wings to remind him of his perfect angel.


End file.
